I had an amazingly productive day at work. We’ll call this spurt of enthusiasm the “surge” before the inevitable withdrawal.
In spite of my newly rediscovered work ethic, I managed to squeeze in some conversations extremely high in comedic value:
PIMPING 101
[the following conversation took place between 2:39 - 3:25 PM]
3:16 PM prime: “they would still have to meet tight criteria to get funding.”
hahahahah
3:23 PM me: no pimping program though
unfortunately
3:24 PM pimping: it’s not easy
3:25 PM prime: being out there as a pimp 101
“taking your pimping big, spending g’s”
3:26 PM there’s a baller certification program, though
me: night classes, nice
3:27 PM prime: natch
WOMEN AND SANDWICHES FIRST
[the following conversation took place between 2:06 - 2:09 PM on GMail chat]
2:06 PM Jackie: so we were just evacuated from the building
cuz the fire alarm went off
2:07 PM my co worker immediately starts gathering her documents
and laptop and shit
and I….
reach for my sandwich
*hangs head
and now she wont stop making fun of me
IT WAS THE CLOSEST THING TO ME
DENNIS MILLER, LIVE!
[the following conversation took place between 2:55 - 2:59 PM on GMail chat]
2:55 PM me: today xxxxxx and i had an idea for a website:
2:56 PM take every transcript of anything dennis miller has ever said
and wikipedia it
Adam: oh i like that
there would have to be pictures
and diagrams
flow charts
2:57 PM me: exactly
Adam: how can i help?
me: and percentages of esoteric-isms
meaning people would say “i get this reference” or “i don’t get this reference”
2:58 PM Adam: could we bring in other former weekend update anchors as guest-bloggers, and have them contribute counterpoint arguments?
“Norm Macdonald disagrees…”
me: “duhhhhhhh”
2:59 PM Adam: excellent
SHITTING TO THE OLDIES
[the following conversation took place between 1:06 - 1:08 PM on GMail chat] 1:06 PM prime:further evidence of the fall of civilization
1:06 PM me: hmmmm
i think they went too classy with the product description
“shit wiper soundtrack”
1:07 PM would sell more units
wipe to mexican red eye of the tiger!
prime: hahahahhaha
1:08 PM yeah, although in their defence, i think almost any product description would be “too classy”
And this is just the stuff that is SFW. There was plenty of stuff I omitted that is NSFW. And some great verbal conversations including “If Virginia is for lovers, Maryland is for crabs;” and “Oh boy! My meat grinder came!” [spoken in Afghani accent].
All of which reminds me how hilarious all of my friends are. If anyone wants to write anything for roughly 50 or so daily slackers but is too lazy to start their own blog, I’d be happy to post it for you.
–Jon
I had an amazingly productive day at work. We’ll call this spurt of enthusiasm the “surge” before the inevitable withdrawal.
2 responses so far ↓
Adam // July 20, 2007 at 3:30 am |
I thought me making the blog would be the highlight of the post, and then I got to the Afghan meat grinder.
Jon // July 24, 2007 at 1:52 am |
They is popping corns downstair!